Our capacity for sacrifice to become an option we choose, depends on our ability to go beyond that first part of the definition. No one will willingly give up something of value without believing that their choice will allow something of more value be obtained. […]
The new paradigm asks each of us the question, “Are our elders worth interrupting our own lives?” My friend’s father, Norm, had been institutionalized for a long time. In fact, he and his wife put themselves into the Lancaster, PA retirement home so they wouldn’t […]
This simple example is the new paradigm and it is very old fashioned. It begins with a willingness to interrupt plans, change goals and visions and be in immediate response to what is happening, offering our help. I am a caregiver and my life showed […]
For me this story illustrates how easily the calm, hard working, exhausted, sometimes discouraged caregiver’s needs can be overlooked in the drama of the patient’s illness. Sheila is a powerhouse ballet teacher who’s list of students who have become illustrious, professional, principal and solo dancers […]
My dad has been a moral compass for me; not because he is always right but because he takes responsibility when he is wrong. My father is 89 years old and I find it fitting to write about him in my 89th blog. He is […]
No person IS their disease but a person can feel like that disease they are experiencing erases them. Recognizing this is a good step towards taking action to help someone living with disease to come home to themselves. When I was a young mother I […]
The good news for us was that the friends who were able to show up and the friendships forged after the disease was well into play, have been reliable, steady and true. After a disease is diagnosed, some relationships will change or end. We all […]
“Look what you have created here! So much life and all your family and people all around making your life a heaven.” When I was thirty five Andy and I traveled with our kids in our camper, all over the USA, selling our work at […]
When I spent time walking in the mountain forest outside our house, it was as if that connection with nature broadened my view to be able to include Andy’s illness into the whole tapestry of our life. Relationships are designed for change. As I write […]
Andy and I have discovered that strengthening our relationship, and our relationships with family and friends, is our number one way for both of us- patient and caregiver- to live the good life. Having a good life has almost become a cliché. “Whoever ends up […]
